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Thursday September 9, 2006 | 4:14PM     Long time, no LJ +     mood| artistic     So, it has been forever since I have made use of LJ. Mostly because I have been a busy guy doing other things. Namely, finishing my degree and getting ready to be a real-life adult. And let me tell you how fun that has been... or not. Anyway, I've moved my blogging activities over to a proper website with its own domain. It's at if you are inclined to keep up with it. Its mostly about various aesthetic/design things, not so much a diary. At some point when I am less busy with things I may start up a more personal diary type blog site again, but for now I'm afraid this one will languish. Check out if you are at all interested, I'd love any kind of feedback all my LJ people might have about it. You can email me from the about page on the site or comment here.

Sunday February 2, 2006 | 6:28PM     2 | +     Last night was my birthday party. Aside from things starting out late it was really fun. We started out at Shima sushi on Van Ness, which ended up being really good. It was quiet, inexpensive and the food was quite good. Everyone agreed that it was a good destination. We then proceeded to Aunt Charlie's to check that out. For the non-SF people, Aunt Charlies is a really old gay bar in the Tenderloin (the downtown ghetto, that used to be the gayborhood in the 50's and 60's before the Castro was the big gayborhood).

Charlies was interesting. It was really empty, and we were the youngest people there by about 30 years. The drag show was mostly fun, not quite as good as Trannyshack. The music was more old big band musical type stuff, not contemporary. Very old school gay, which I like, but its not to everyone's taste. One of the drag queens was 71 and still going at it! I was impressed. After Charlie's we ended up going to Pop roxx at the DNA Lounge in soma. It was expensive and really fun as usual. I saw the same guy that I secretly drooled over last time. Even though he surely is a vapid hipster and was there with the guy that I always see him with. Of course, there were a lot of people somewhere along the hipster-to-goth spectrum there. Lots to look at and enjoy while drunk.

I've decided that it is time for the long hipster hair to make a comeback. So I've been planning on letting it grow out and dyeing it jet black again. It will be hot and seductive, or just different from the short hair I have now.

Anyway, I just wanted to say that I had a very good birthday, raininess aside.

Thursday February 2, 2006 | 9:36PM     +     Things have been going well lately. I'm fairly settled in my class and work routine, so I am maintaining a certain homeostasis in my life at the moment. I've managed to subside some of my more recent emotional turbulence. The trouble with a routine way of life is that there is no dynamism to make it exciting. The entrance of other vectors of motion and energy may cause turbulence, but they always provide one with something to write about. Nothing ventured, noting gained. Its become the time to venture more, but in a directed and not abandoned way. I am over-inclined to abandon and projection. Living in the mind has its pleasures, but most often it results in a contradiction with the aegis and auspices of reality.

I need to seek some more dynamism and take more in while I have the time to expend.

Sunday February 2, 2006 | 12:45AM     hello again 1 | +     I haven't written in here for a long time. I had planned on getting together a free standing blog and got bogged down and haven't gotten around to it. I'm still working on that, but in the meantime, the journal crazy has hit me again. So, here I am until I can move this to a blog proper.
So, Im my long long hiatus, I finished my BFA design thesis. It was well received and I had fun doing it. It was stressful, but in the end I loved the class. It made me realize that I need to go to grad school for sure and get a MFA or MA, if not to go for some kind of PHd eventually as well. But I had no free time or real life. Now in this semester, I have soooo much less work to do that its really nice. All I am taking are academic classes, no studio. So these are my classes:

Oikos (ecology, economics, intellectual and cultural history wrapped up into one big ball of holistic studies goodness),
Excavating popular culture (study of the development of the consumer society and its attendant powers of spectacle),
Aspects of Critical Theory (midcentury formalism up to post-structural, contemporary art theory),
Classical Notions (history of era's of "classical" civilization),
Body Art (contemporary art about, well, the human body, fun side note, the word masturbatory or scatological is used at least once a class in the teachers lecture)
and Fiction Writing (self-explanitory).

So far this semester has been really good. Mostly because of the free time that I now have, even with six, yes six, classes. That is how intense studio classes were, they consume all free time you have. So now, even with six classes, I feel liberated. Anyway, I really and enjoying all of my classes. I have felt really inspired to write and read about topics that are interesting to me. I've been slacking on the preparing to get a job field, but, its still early yet. No need to panic.

I really like all of my classes. Each one has been really inspiring in some way or another. I really should just become a professional academic at some point in my life and spend all day writing and reading. Its been a good time for friendships too lately. I've been a lot more social, which is good for me.

Romance, or any semblance thereof of course is non-existent, you know, outside my head as usual. I have come to resent the way the computer toys with you and offers you the semblance of chances and choices. I should write something about how the internet promises connections but in the end only makes us feel more alone in the world. In a way its a lot like the spectacle of choice at the supermarket. You are offered a panoply of goods, but the actual range of choices is highly constrained, orchestrated, and so superficially differentiated as to be meaningless. There may be twenty kinds of toothpaste, but the active ingredient is all the same and they are all produced in the same three centralized factories. The more I take in and stitch things together the sadder the world gets. The unfortunate side of being not-so-busy is having ample time for introspective contemplation and needless analyzation. Boredom is the progenitor of loneliness. If its sounds dramatic, its only because I've worked it up to such a state by festering in my own juice. If only I could be more focused in developing myself some ample and worthwhile distractions. Maybe a routine discipline would work well, like exercise or something.

The weather has been so beautiful lately. Another small joy of San Francisco, a place where a winter-born child can have a summery birthday month. I should really get back to bike riding and going to Marin. Maybe getting out of the city would soothe my rattled nerves. Also, I may just move to Hayes valley after all. (That's been a goal of mine, for like, the past five months.) Moving is a hassle, but I think it would be good for me. Anyway, to much blather. Until next time.

Wednesday June 6, 2005 | 11:54PM     +     It has been a long time since I posted anything here. I've not been particularly busy or anything, quite the opposite in fact. Things have been quite routine more or less for the past couple of weeks, and thus I have nothing really exciting to report. This weekend is pride, so that should be fun. I don't really know if I will do anything special aside from the parade and the street fair. If nothing else there will be lots of interesting things to see. And by interesting, I mean mostly naked guys. :) I love SF.

Tuesday May 5, 2005 | 8:00PM     +     Well, it looks as if things will be settling down some around my place. Now that the roommate moving situation is more finished and done with. Things are so much more pleasant now that things are clean, and we have floor space again. Other than that things have been pretty sedate. I may end up working on another free-lance book design project this summer for the Wattis institute. So two websites and a book, not bad.
This week was not so hot money wise. Apparently the summer job paperwork didn't go through. So, instead of getting a $350 check today, I got a $45 one. So, hopefully that will be fixed and I will get paid for the rest of the days that I worked for that pay period. Too bad it won't be until the 15th. I guess its kind of good, because it will force me to save money inadvertently. Ho hum. This will put a stop on my antique buying frenzy for now at least.

Wednesday May 5, 2005 | 11:18PM     +     Today was pretty mellow. It was rainy and foggy off and on today. I circled the Mission/Valencia corridor in the morning looking for a cheap antique settee. No luck. I found one that would work, if it were not $500. It was really cute though, rococo, gilded, fête galante upholstery. The past couple weeks have been a surreptitious apartment reorganization planning-fest, in light of my current roommates impending departure. Unfortunately said current roommate is taking her good sweet time cleaning up all her crap and carting it out of here. She's been cross and standoffish to me for months though, its getting annoying. She had the never to tell me today that she didn't want my new roommate to stay here before she had left. Her reasoning, because "she is the one who paid the rent and not him." This is the same person who invited her friend to stay at our place indefinitely, without even asking me first.

All I will say, is I won't be sad to see her go. I've had enough of passive aggressive DRAMA and people who don't wash their dished for months, and people who let their stuff cascade all over the floor. Basically, I am tired of living with someone who still lives like they are in a college dorm. Is a little decorum, candor, and geniality too much to ask for in this world? I would hope not. At any rate. I am looking forward to a less grating existence next month.

I really don't like times when your living situation is in flux, but you are just waiting for things to turn over and can't get anything done in the mean time. Tick tick tick. Otherwise things are pretty good. I've been able to keep myself fairly busy lately. I've not been as productive creating things wise. I've been reading a lot, and cleaning and organizing. I really need to sit down and finish out some of the projects that i have started. Like a print portfolio... so I can get a job... *sigh*

Sunday May 5, 2005 | 9:22PM     +     I haven't updated this thing in so long. I am still here. I have just been really busy with school in past weeks. And then after school was out I made up ample distractions and just didn't get to writing anything. So, to catch up, school was over last week. The last week wasn't really so bad. The second from last week was a little much, but in the end I got everything done and it was all very un-stressful. I've just been working at my office job at school dealing with all the graduation stuff, which was Saturday. Now that graduation is over things should clam down a lot. Hopefully all the packing up of stuff will be done before I get back to work on Tuesday.

I went to the baccalaureate exhibition and the MFA show. I have to say that I was pretty disappointed with the MFA show. I didn't really expect to be wowed by the undergrad show, but there was some good stuff there. The MFA painting was especially lackluster. It seemed to be a lot of sloppy vaguely representational or color/pattern abstract work. There was also some decent but not really provocative Robert Bechtel style paintings. There was this abstract color/wood panel painting that was really nice. i was less impressed when I looked at it closely and realized that it was partially preprinted wood grain contact paper and not cut out wood veneer. It was still cute though. It felt like there was a whole lot less work that there was last year. And the grad studios were so cramped and packed full that it wasn't really all that enjoyable. I'm turning into such a cranky old man, complaining that things just aren't the way they used to be.

I've been reading a book about the Enlightenment recently. Its been my new micro obsession. Its such a contrast to todays world in terms of outlook and mentality. Why is it that America is slipping back into the dark ages? Sad, sad, sad. Other than reading and keeping busy with various projects, I've mostly just been cleaning and rearranging things in my apartment. I am turning into such a housewife, and not a bitter housewife. Cleaning can be a mindless kind of meditation if you let it. That will be all for now of my idle prattle.

Sunday May 5, 2005 | 8:23PM     +     I had a dream last night that there was water leaking down from the apartment above us and that our kitchen ceiling was starting to crumble and fall down. It was strange. I actually had several weird dreams, but that is the only one that I can remember.

Thursday April 4, 2005 | 8:27AM     2 | +     I dreamt about Terri Schaivo last night. It was so odd, she woke up and we were filling out right to die and legal guardianship paperwork. All I want to know is where did that come from? Thats really all that I can remember about my dream from last night, although it was really vivid. I lost the rest of it, but I swear most of the dream really was about Terri Schaivo. And my roommate decided to come home at sometime after midnight and eat super loud doritos while I was sleeping. That always annoys me.

Sunday April 4, 2005 | 1:47PM     1 | +     What a glorious and wonderful day it is today. This is all that needs to be said for now.

Friday April 4, 2005 | 7:11PM     2 | +     It will be said that the despot assures his subjects civil tranquillity. Granted; but what do they gain, if the wars his ambition brings down upon them, his insatiable avidity, and the vexations conduct of his ministers press harder on them than their own dissensions would have done? What do they gain, if the very tranquillity they enjoy is one of their miseries? Tranquillity is found also in dungeons; but is that enough to make them desirable places to live in? The Greeks imprisoned in the cave of the Cyclops lived there very tranquilly, while they were awaiting their turn to be devoured.
--Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Thursday March 3, 2005 | 11:07PM     9 | +     Oh spring break, where have you gone? You are a crafty one you are, escaping me like that. Oh well, I guess we weren't meant to be together indefinitely. I tried to pin you down, but wanderlust got the best of you and you departed. We had some good moments, but I was kidding myself thinking it would last. When it rained the first three days I should have taken that as an omen of our impending separation, but I lacked that foresight. sigh...

Thursday March 3, 2005 | 10:30PM     2 | +     Well, spring break is almost upon me. Most of the time will no doubt be spent getting caught up in the homework business. School has been fairly well so far this semester. I've only had an average of one overwhelming day per week recently, thats doing fairly well. I finally got the check from GEICO reimbursing me for my old bike. That was some highly needed money. Props to Valencia Cyclery for writing me a $300 quote on a bike I found under the freeway. Now I just have to hope that I can manage to get the full $10,000 or so from the rest of the settlement Thats what the insurance guy thought it might come to total for the pain and suffering side. I had no idea that an accident like that could bring in so much money.

That will take forever though, I need to go to a plastic surgeon or something over break and have them quote me on the scar repair. Supposedly, I could get even more money from the settlement if the scar would be expensive to repair. If the settlement works out like that, that would be so great. I could pay off all of my student loans before I even graduate... That would rock. I would not suggest making getting hit by cars a regular source of income, but in this case I can't really complain if it happens. We'll see though.

In other news, I really need to start seriously looking for a new roommate sometime soon. I am thinking I will put up ads up at school and Craigslist after I get back from spring break. If you know anyone who is on the market for cheap digs in SF let me know...

I've been in a super fixy mood lately. Its all the thoughts of my roommates stuff being gone, I'm redecorating in my head already. I've been trying to clean up and clear out. It is really amazing just how much crap that I have. What is more amazing is that despite the fact that I haven't used three-quarters of these items in a year or more, I am still not able to just throw them out. I've been making small steps. I set the bad sewing machine on the curb a couple of weeks ago, it disappeared fairly quickly. I really should take some of my old clothes into sell on Haight or something, its barely worth it though. I know they won't take any of it. I should just set them all out for the homeless or something. Dispensing with needless clutter is the best feeling in the world, well aside from a good orgasm. But both of those are rather non-present in my life right now.

Friday March 3, 2005 | 1:23AM     1 | +     I watched Party Monster tonight. It was a good movie, I liked it. I had bought it at Rasputin for $8, so it was worth it. Thank you Rasputin for cheap used DVDs. I also bought Blade Runner for my Type 4 class. We have this new thing were we are typographically interpreting a scene from a movie. Hence, my movie shopping. Anyway, I really liked Party Monster for its little moments. Not so much for the party side of it, but for the social side of it. Like, all the catty things that the characters did. It makes me wish I had more catty gay friends to actually hang out with, and have a decent social life. Speaking of catty queers, GD4 was a absolute riot. I won't really be able to explain it all, because the humor all depends on the dynamic of the ground of that class, basically, it breaks down to five gay guys, three asians, and three girls. Incidentally, we all ended up sitting in that formation today for some reason, which is what made me think of it that way. I will just say that there was much chitter-chatter about America's Top Model at one end of the table, and a lot of confusion at the other.

Not only that, but I made a complete fool of myself about liking cats a little to much. The conversation went from minimalist paintings to fetish objects to America's Top Model, then to naive folk paintings. It was a great time. I love my GD4 teacher, even if he is a dog person.

This weekend I will be swamped with work. I have way to much to do, and it is already enumerated for me in iCal, and I don't even want to think about all of it. Suffice it to say that my prediction of being inundated this weekend, due to lack of stuff to do last weekend was all to true. But, I am getting paid to do some of this work, so that part is never to be turned down. Spring break is after next week. I'm mostly looking forward to it, but I'm not doing anything special or anything, so it will just be a little more sleeping and a week lacking structure. I really should be starting to look for a new roommate or living situation. Granted I was fairly lucky last time, but how long can it take to find a good roommate? Is three months too early. I have a feeling that it is, two months seems more reasonable. But another part of me says I should get a jump on things. I guess we'll see in couple of weeks.

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